Good evening folks. I have read and appreciated many fine stories on the forum. Thanks again to all those willing to share.
I have been a lurker for a while and only recently signed up. I have a friend who has always been there for me. His life and relationships like many, have not been the Beaver Cleaver family variety. Over the years we have discussed books and ideas. To amuse myself and him, I decided to write a story that he could see a small part of himself in and hopefully make him laugh.
I am not a an actual writer. I have no formal training and as I recall I made all my English teachers run screaming from the room.
Be warned that I make no claims to ability nor to being capable of writing anything entertaining. I can't spell and grammar is something you dunk in milk and eat after supper, right? If you proceed beyond this point and actually read what I have written remember you have had fair warning. What you see here is part of a much larger story line but I felt it could be a stand alone story so thought I would post it. I did go to the trouble of copyrighting the whole story. All I ask is that you not post this on any other sites. Also be warned that the story I post here is all there will be. The end is truly the end of this part of the story so there won't be any MOAR posted. :)
Run, while you still can!
A short story
(Sound of dueling banjos from Deliverance)
Doggone phone, thought Po, just have to wait till I get this part clamped down. (Sound of dueling banjos from Deliverance) (Silence) Hold on hold on I’ll get to you in a sec. Funny seems to have stopped. (Sound of dueling banjos from Deliverance) What the heck? Who is being so persistent? Doggone phone is going to drive me insane one day! (Sound of dueling banjos from Deliverance) Stepping away from his machine Po wipes his oily hands on a rag and grabs the phone. Out of state and a number I don’t know, what the heck? Hello? Po listen. Madd? What the heck Madd you gone crazy or what. (Laughing) Po you in the shop? Its daylight and a work day, where the heck do suppose I’d be? Po, listen, I need you to walk away from your machine to a place quiet enough to talk, just trust me, walk away now! That’s strange, Madd never calls or asks for anything, guess I better humor him. OK, I’m in the break room but make it quick. My machine is making a couple of passes on a $3,000 part and it has to ship today. Po, you ever know me to be involved in a practical joke or do a single thing to harm anyone we know? No, can’t say I have, you have always been dependable and there when I needed to vent about how crappy life can be. Po I am going to ask for a lot of trust, but I swear to you, what I am about to say is a fact and not supposition. Oookkk, what’s up? You remember our discussions about me having some sources that could let us know in advance if the **** was going to hit the fan? About knowing people that could give us a warning if the world as we know it was about to collapse? We gonna talk about this on the phone guy, it isn’t very good opsec? Frankly you got me a little worried, what’s up Madd? Truth to tell Po, it’s time to be a lot more than worried about now. To answer your question, in 10 hours give or take, opsec on these phones won’t matter in the least.
Po’s blood ran cold. He, Madd and the cousins had discussed end of the world scenarios and how to prepare many times. Considering what he knew about the person he was talking to, Po was positive he wasn’t going to like what came next.
Here goes, and just listen till I finish. Over in Afghanistan our squad got hooked up with a guy doing black ops. You met him there, we just called him Al. We did 4 or 5 things with him, on the last one he got shot up, you had headed back state side before we did that last run. Our guys were hurting too, but we managed to get ourselves out of a tight spot. We got everyone including him out of there. Was bad real bad. He survived but was flown out to Germany. That was the last time we saw him for a while. The cousins and I sort of adopted him. After getting back and healing up he got kicked upstairs in his agency and that was that. We all kept in touch like guys who have served together sometimes do, with a lot of standup guys like you, ones that have become good friends. He became more. I had this aunt who was a widow and he fell for her in a big way. She thought he walked on water so they became an item. He has become part of the family. This is important so pay attention. He is now family and would never jerk us around.
I have no idea how, but he knows that Iran is about to launch 4 nukes at Israel. The Israelis found out about it. There are no obvious signs that they intend anything. However the usual give and take of information between our countries seems to have gotten a little less productive. Digging below the surface of day to day exchanges seems to indicate that all their agencies like the Mossad are locked down. It’s more like they have all their people too busy to keep up the usual facade, not that they were exactly blabbermouths to begin with. Even though they are maintaining the “business as usual” pretense our source has sources that have fed him vital information. The Israelis didn’t take the information about Iran’s upcoming attack at all well.
Estimates are that Israel has 100 to 400 nukes and Jericho intercontinental ballistic missiles. With a range of 11,500 km (7,000 miles) they can take out the whole Middle East plus, if they want. There is speculation they have better missiles available so who knows how far they can reach. Even the 7,000 miles will let them reach Moscow. That all sounds pretty bad, but it gets worse. No one knows all the missile sites that the Israelis have missiles at, but at least 70 sites suspected of housing missiles are showing some type of minor activity. They are 7 hours ahead of us, I called you at 8:10am that makes it 3:10pm there, only a few hours till daylight. This isn’t conventional warfare, there is no advantage to waiting until just before dawn to start an attack as you would when attacking a troop position. Best guess is they might wait till the next night to launch. It’s easier to conceal what they are doing when it gets dark again, and that would let them finish any last minute adjustments in the dark. Sundown this time of year is about 7:30pm full dark around 8:30 their time. With luck that gives you 5 1/2 hours plus, maybe as much as 6 or 7, if you walk out right now.
Po, go, you need to leave NOW. I know this is hard to believe but it is a fact. Some kind of serious crap is about to go down. Russia hasn’t been at all pleased with Israel and the US thwarting their plans for the Middle East. What happens if they use this as an excuse to rid the world of a thorn in their side? Is the US going to sit around while that happens? I grant you that considering who we have leading our country it’s a possible scenario, but the military might force his hand one way or the other. If Israel should decide no help is coming and they are about to be wiped out, who knows where all those nukes might be sent? What happens to the world if they decide to nuke all the oilfields in the Middle East? The world will implode without Middle East oil. There is just way too much chance of this thing going south. If that happens I think we can safely say the whole world is going to have a very bad day!
Bud, I can’t just walk out, I just can’t. I have to try and save some of the people I work with. Some are family too, maybe not as close as I would like, but family just the same. I understand Po, but think about it for a sec, how many will believe you when you tell them, a friend of a friend told you so?
I believe you Madd, it is hard but knowing you, you are doing your best to give me information you believe to be a fact. What if your guys is wrong, or it doesn’t get as bad as you fear?
What if it does and you haven’t tried to get to your parents, and your other relatives down home? You might make it without them. But they will need you if things only get half as bad as they might. They are going to need you there, not hundreds of miles away. If things get bad enough fast enough you will never make it home through the mobs trying to get out of your city. What about those big population centers between you and home? If you have to, you might walk home in 5 or 6 weeks, if you don’t get killed on the way. But what might happen to your family down there in 6 weeks? Or if you don’t make it at all? I have to try Madd. With a heavy sigh Madd said, I know Po, just don’t take too long. Do me one favor besides getting out of there ASAP. Call me as soon as you walk out of work at this number, don’t forget, it is important, OK? Sure thing Bud, I will get back to you, my word on it.
Hello, that you Po? Ya, bud it’s me. You don’t sound all that happy, guess it didn’t go all that well? No bud it didn’t. Bottom line is, they would have called the guys in the white coats if I tried to take it any further. I know it is hard for anyone to believe the world as they know it I going to end, but it doesn’t change the fact. That’s true Madd, I might have had a chance if they didn’t bring up religion. Religion? Ya, they kept saying God would never allow such a thing to happen. Ah….ah..sorry Po I just don’t know what to say to something as stupid as that. Neither did I Madd, one of the reasons I couldn’t convince them was that I didn’t have an answer either.
(Sound of a Ford F250 starting up) I am headed to the apartment now Madd, what was it you wanted me to call about? You got your receiver hitch and that e-tool you told me you always carry to dig you out of the snow and stuff, with you? Sure, the receiver is locked in so the hitch can’t be stolen and the e-tool is like an American Express card, never leave home without it. What’s up? Ok, about 6 blocks from your apartment there is an All Seasons climate controlled storage facility, you know it? I pass it about 3-4 times a week so I know where it is. Pull into the lot in front, go to the far end of the parking spaces and you will see some large rocks that are the boarder for the parking lot edge. How long before you get there? Maybe 6 minutes. K, I will stay on the line, you concentrate on driving.
Bud, I’m there what now? Pull up so that your truck blocks the view of those rocks from the rest of the facility. With that brick wall to your right you should be able to block 95% of the view from anyone. Got it blocked, what now? Count 9 rocks from the right, it has a spot on top that is more flat than the others, see it? Hmm, I see it. All right, it’s heavy but you should be able to roll it backward 18” or so with some effort. Roll a rock? Just please do it. OK, got it rolled back what now? Take your e-tool, dig down about 16”, and you will find what looks like a flattish rock about the size of your fist, pick it up. It might feel a little funny. When you have it, use the e-tool to hit it, it should break apart. It is a type of Plaster of Paris and while it was made and colored to look like any rock found in that dirt, it should be a lot softer. After you break it you will find a plastic bag with keys and some papers. (Clanging and damning) OK, got it Madd. Great Po, there is a string of numbers on one of the papers. It will allow you to use the security keypad for the drive in door to your far left. You can just drive in, the storage cubicles are all well numbered. The one you are looking for is about 10 cubicles in. When you find it, just back up to it as close as you can, and open the cubicle. There is a lock combo below the numbers you used to get into the facility. Let me know when you get it opened and Po, hurry as much as you can without breaking anything, the clock is ticking as we speak.
(Pounding, screeching and damning) Got it opened, there is a heavy duty closed trailer here. Triple axles, thing looks like you could fill it with lead and it wouldn’t even notice it. Good deal Po, now just hook up to it and head home, the trailer pigtail will hook up to the standard Ford plug by your back bumper, and the trailer is titled and tagged in your state as a rental trailer. That is if a Ford 250 will actually haul anything. Hey, hey what are you saying? A Ford with the trailer towing package like I got will tow 12,000 14,000 pounds buddy! (Choking laughter) If you say so Po, I would feel better if you had a Chevy. Ya right! It only has to haul it approximately 300 miles one time, it might make it. You are serious aren’t you, what is in there anyway? Tell you in a second. Another one of the keys will open the back of the trailer the second will open a metal security box in the trailer, but don’t worry about that right now. There is a manila envelope with a lease agreement in there. It will provide all the paperwork you need to show you legitimately leased this trailer and have the right to take it anywhere you want. Just in case you should get pulled over, but do not get pulled over! See the little pushed out place at the front of the trailer, looks like a sort of flat V shape that comes out onto the trailer hitch? Yep, looks like it houses a generator on one side of some type and a largish fuel tank in a separate compartment to the side of it. You will need to start that up, it is a small cooler similar to the type long haul truckers use to cool their tractors so they don’t have to run the engine all night to stay cool. Unless you get into some really hot direct sunlight it will keep the trailer and its contents at around 65 degrees. You will also find 3 high grade satellite phones that are paid up, they may need to be charged but they have an adapter for the lighter socket. There are some phone numbers in that envelope that we can use to communicate with. Soon as you get one of those charged up, don’t use your personal phone to call me again. The number I am using now and my old number will cease to exist in another hour.
Madd, what is going on bud, I mean what is all this? My friend as much as I hate to say it, I believe it’s the end of the world as we know it. Since the guy I told you about has been with my aunt, he has seen the world sliding closer to the brink almost every day. Believe me, he and a close circle of friends are in a position to see a lot of things that the rest of the world and a lot of other government agencies have no idea about. You are still working as we talk right? I am I am. Good.
About the trailer. I was worried things would go pop from what I was hearing. But nothing was certain, and until this thing with Iran, it looked like the world might keep chugging along, no way to know. I wanted to help protect you and yours but knew it would be hard to explain I had a gut feeling and access to intel that things were going south. You and your folks are already prepping, I know that, but this is just some extra for you and your folks. For two reasons I decided to go ahead and preposition that trailer so you couldn’t argue with me. What do you mean argue? If I had said, Hey Po, I am going to give you a trailer, with a lot of survival supplies in it, what would have said? Hmm, I would have said No Way Jose. (Laughing) Exactly. I am over 1,500 miles away. I wasn’t going to be able to be there to help, plus I have family as well, so that trailer was the best I could do. If the world got better I could just come up and get it, no one the wiser, if the world fell apart I could do something for a good friend. Simple as that. Thanks bud, I don’t know what to say. I feel bad about taking something for nothing. Kills you to accept anything, even from a friend, I know that, but in this case there isn’t much you can do now is there? (Laughing) Ass, ok, I am all hooked up and ready to go, but what is behind the plywood divider, looks like over 60% of the trailer is full? (Sounds of a Ford 250 starting and easing into trailer hauling mode) Emergency food supply in ready-made meals that are nitrogen-purged and sealed in 4-serving Mylar pouches, placed inside a tamper-proof sealed square bucket. The 24 stack able buckets are reseal able to keep your supply fresh. The packaging is tough and compact, it uses only a fraction of the space in the trailer for each bucket. The food supply has a 25 year shelf life with proper storage.
3 Servings per day per Person - 2880 servings in (24) Stack able Buckets enough to feed four adults or two adults and four kids for 12 months. The dimensions on each bucket are 10” x 10” x 13”. Trailer box inside is 84”wide, 86” high, 360” or 30’ long. It has 576 buckets, could be more, I am kind of busy here, so I can’t remember exactly how many there are. Actually 250 of them contain, rice, flour, honey, sugar, coffee, well a lot of stuff, can’t remember it all right now. I am talking to you and coordinating some stuff here as well so my brain is kind of split. But they contain about the same amount of nutrition as the prepackaged meal ones do. Figured it would be good for farm folk as they could make their own dishes to suit themselves.
What? What, are you insane? How did you get that many in there? It must have cost $20,000 to buy! How am I going to get the cash to you? I don’t need the cash. You pointed out that cash won’t be worth anything to me plenty of times when we talked about SHTF episodes. No need to worry about sending me something that won’t even make a good fire. As far as being crazy, I think we came to the conclusion long ago that neither of us has all our oars in the water. As for the space, divide it up for yourself. Trailer is 84” wide so 8 buckets fit across. 84” high lets you stack those 6 high. 120” or 10’ lets you stack 12 back. So, 6x8 is 48. 48x12 is 576, see simple. Simple, man calls it simple. (Indistinct mumbling) That is, what 24 years? Give or take that was what I came up with. Sounds like a lot I know, but you have a lot more than 4 adults down home. If there are 8 or 10 of you then you are going to be down, to 10 years or less fairly fast. I have pulled up load out list now. Actually there are 576 + buckets of food and 30, 5 gallon buckets full of heirloom seeds and other stuff you might find useful. I am speechless, don’t know what to say. Wow, you speechless? Bet your ex-wives would never believe that. (Laughing) Damn bud, you would have to bring them up. The world ending isn’t bad enough, you just had to make me think of them! (Laughing and choking) Sorry Po, sorry. (Mutual laughing)
I am pulling into the parking garage, good thing that trailer isn’t any higher or I wouldn’t get in here. I have to get loaded, I will call you as I roll out. Po, take what you need, because I doubt you will ever be back, but cut it down to essentials. Computer, clothes, weapons, maybe your sheets and blankets. Stuff can be replace or found, but if you are caught out on the road, having your Barco lounger isn’t going to do you much good. You have to hurry, you need to beat as much of the traffic as you can. Left you space in the back of the trailer but pack your stuff in as tight and neat as you can. There are all kinds of tie downs and some moving blankets back there. If at all possible try and keep the bed of your truck empty. 10-4 Madd. Hmm, maybe I should have been a little more forthcoming with Madd about how much stuff my dad and I already have in stock. He could have saved himself all this trouble. Well, knowing Madd, it probably wouldn’t have mattered. And you can never have too much.
(blurppp blurppp blurppp sound of incoming satellite phone call) Po, you on the road dude? Yeppers rolling now. You did that faster than I thought you would. Caught a break Madd, we have a service here for taking care of the grounds. Lot of Latino guys. I offered 3 of them $40 bucks for 1 hour of work. It only took 28 minutes to load with their help, would have taken me couple of hours by myself. Freaking killed me to pay it but I figured if things get as bad as they might, $120 was cheap to get me on my way. The real motivator was your comment about traffic, I hate traffic with a passion! Good thinking guy.
That metal box where is it? Got in my way so I threw it on the floor of the cab, why? Whooee, OK. There is one more key in all that stuff I gave you, it opens the box. Just a sec Madd, rolling into the gas station to top off, OK, so? You might consider keeping it out of sight while you open it and look inside. I got a bad feeling here Madd, what did you do? Not much, just some corporate credit cards with your name on them. Credit cards, why does one of them look like a Colt 45 Gold Cup Series 70 in mint condition and 6 magazines? And 3 of them look like boxes of 45 ACP ammo? Well, if things get bad you can shove it into some guys face and tell him you want him to leave your credit cards alone. It’s better than a magnetic strip to foil credit card theft. Ya, right, ass. Now that we cleared that up, I remember some guy telling me that credit will be one of the first things to fail. I agree with you, so use them to buy fuel or anything you might need. Don’t pay any more cash for anything if people will take a card. Even if there is a power failure some places are still going to be able to imprint those cards by hand, so use them if you can. Use an ATM to draw out all the cash you can, hold onto that as well. Save cash for now, it won’t be good for long, but it might take a while for people to figure that out.
Way ahead of you Madd. My bank is just a couple blocks down, from this station. I am going to withdraw my savings and safety deposit box. I expect they will make it hard to get much cash though. In my experience banks have no problem taking your money, but if you want very much of it back they will hem and haw. They will say they don’t have a lot on hand or that it is bank policy that you give them 24 or 36 hours’ notice to draw a lot of cash out. They will probably try to get me to take a cashier’s check. But that isn’t much good, because who is going to give me $30,000 or $40,000 cash if my own bank won’t cough it up? Exactly what I was thinking when you said you were going to the bank. Damn Madd you don’t have to agree so quickly. You are just full of good news and cheer today aren’t you? (Laughing) I know it is your money and you want it, but please, don’t spend too much time on it. It won’t help to be dead on the side of the road with full pockets.
How full is the trailer and your truck? I only had a one bedroom apartment, so didn’t have much furniture actually. Got my computers, weapons, ammo, cloths and most all the breakable stuff in the extra cab. Had to put some of the preps I had up here in the extra cab and some in the trailer. Bed of the truck is totally empty, and I used less than 10’ of the trailer for some furniture and boxes I packed odds and ends into. Mostly light stuff. Could have moved it all myself, but I would have had to make 20 trips up and down the elevators if I didn’t have help. Worked well, one set of guys loading, one set going down the elevator with a load, and then loading as the other set went back up and grabbed more stuff to take down. They were a lot of help with my collapsible pontoon boat too. Made moving it much easier. Didn’t know what to do with it exactly, so I pulled out of the garage and had those guys help me strap it to the top of the trailer. Good thing I am moving though. Why is that Po? I kept turning the elevator off, so I would have it to use without waiting for it. As I was walking to my truck the apartment management guy found me and started giving me crap. I told him to kiss my hairy ass. (Laughing and choking) Then I just kept walking away from the little ****. Left that damn couch behind. The one that seemed to trap you into sleeping on it and waking up all crippled? That would be the one. (Lots of laughing from both ends of the connection) Get back to you in a few, at the bank.
(blurppp blurppp blurppp sound of satellite phone call) Yo. Hey Madd, back in the truck and rolling, we were right they gave me a lot of tap dancing and excuses. Managed to get about half, after I threatened to take a dump in the middle of the bank floor. Wow, I am surprised you got out of there without being arrested. It was close, very close. Sorry it didn’t go better Po. You going down I75 to Columbus then around Columbus on I270? Sure am, same way I always go, why? According to what you said you have something like 8’ of trailer floor empty? That’s about right, why? On the east branch of I270 there is a Sam’s Club, I will text you the address and phone number. I believe you can see it from the highway. OK, so? I placed an order there, it will be all palletized and shrink wrapped. It is paid for, all you have to do is show them the credit card and let them scan it, and you are good to go. They assured me they can get into the bed of your truck with a forklift they use for stocking shelves that are hard to access. The forks articulate and will fit down into the bed of your truck. Call them when you are about 15 minutes out and they will have someone ready to load you. They said their guys will also help you strap it and tarp it. I want to argue about taking all this from you, because I don’t feel good about it. I know you don’t like it. So don’t take it for you, take it for your little nephew, the other kids and your folks. I can’t force you to take it PO, but as a friend I hope you will. Crap, you would have to bring the kids into the argument. I’ll take it, but I am going to pay you for all of it one day. If things don’t go bad you can laugh and point at me, and I won’t mind one bit Po. If things get bad I am going to be worried about you guys over there, and I will have enough on my mind without having to wonder if you are OK. Friends help friends and real friends are hard to come by, ya know? I do, I surely do Madd. What about these credit cards Madd, I mean how do we pay for stuff we get on them? Knowing you they must be legit so at some point they will need to be paid, right? Guess that depends on how things go. If what I think will happen, happens, no one is ever going to ask for payment. If it doesn’t happen, we can split up the food etc. and live a long time without ever having to go to the grocery store. The way you say that sounds logical, but I just can’t help feeling there is a flaw in there somewhere. Only one? I must be doing better than I thought Po. Money isn’t our biggest worry any more. Surviving has to be at the top of our list now. Did you call your parents about this? Yes, while I was moving my stuff out to the trailer. My dad is on board, he has always thought it possible things would go crazy so he has been prepping for a while. But mom is upset. Dad is out laying in supplies as we speak. I told them to keep all this on the down low. Not sure my mom can resist warning the family though. I need to go Po, lots to do around here. The girls need me to help organize. If you need anything, anything at all just let me know. If you think of anything you need from Sam’s etc, call the number that is written in red, that will put you onto one of the girls, she can call in anything to Sam’s or anywhere else, for pick up as you swing by. Catch you in a bit Po. Thanks Madd, talk at you later.
Yes dad I am being careful, but this phone is driving me nuts. I been on the road for 2 hours and it never seems to stop ringing. I have been on with someone, from mom to everyone she told what was happening. Seems like she didn’t really understand my asking her to keep it on the down low. Ask her to please stop giving my number to every family member that calls. Sorry son, she has a big heart and want’s to protect the family. I know, and I feel bad having to worry her. I have to go, I need to think. OK son, you be careful and get here soon, but don’t speed or get hurt, ok? Ok dad. Have to turn this cell phone off. Hope things are going good for Madd and his people, at least he hasn’t been chewing my ear off over the satellite phone. Satellite phone…hmmm..crap. Grabbing the phone Po calls the red number.
(blurppp blurppp blurppp sound of satellite phone call) Hello, Richardson residence. Hi I am Po, I don’t know if you are the right person but Madd said to call if I needed anything. Yes sir I am the girl on duty how may I assist you sir? (Silence) Hello sir, something wrong? No, you just took me off guard is all. Sorry sir. Never mind what’s your name? Cindy speaking. Cindy do you know what is going on, what road I am on and the area I am headed for? I do sir and I know that time is of the essence. Tell me what you need and I will either make it happen or get enough of the girls to help me make it happen sir. How may we be of service sir? Cindy I have been thinking for the last hour of things I need from Cabela’s, do you know what that is? I do, and you don’t need to be polite or delicate or hold my hand, just tell me what you need sir and it will happen. I have been fully briefed on the situation both worldwide as well as your situation sir. I see, I have a rather long list of things I would like to have ready for pick up at Cabela’s. I am getting closer so I don’t have a lot of time. Certainly sir, go ahead I can take down 120 words a minute so talk as fast as you like. (10 minutes later) Got all that Cindy? Yes sir, one of the other girls is on with the store management, giving them your order as you gave it to me. It will be pulled and ready as soon as they can manage it sir. Thanks Cindy that’s great. My pleasure sir. One thing sir. You might consider a tip if things are ready by the time you get there. $1,000 for the manager $500 for his assistant, $150 for each man loading. I believe that might make things proceed smoothly sir. If you examine the bottom of your metal strong box you will see that underneath the weapon and ammunition there is a flat pull up divider. Under that is a sum of money. In addition you will see 4 plastic cylinders. 2 contain 1oz gold coins. The larger 2 contain ¼ and ½oz gold bars. Additionally there are 2 drawstring bags containing pre-1964 silver coins. Is there anything else myself or the household can do to assist you sir? No, no I don’t think so, and thank you Cindy. My pleasure sir. For your convenience, should you need to contact us again, it is not necessary to use our first names. Whoever picks up the phone will answer to “girl”, there is no time for political correctness. All you need do sir, is to start talking after they have answered and you are certain you have reached the correct location. It might speed things up and will make them more comfortable in serving your needs sir. Names are usually reserved for social gatherings. Fine, thank you Cindy. Thank you sir.
Checking his time as he swings off the interstate, Po calculated it had been 3 hours 20 minutes since Madd first called him and it is still 3 hours plus to the farm. I am running out of time. The Cabela’s manager answered on the second ring, and agreed to meet him at the loading dock, all he needed was the physical credit card to run and his men would start loading. When the manager met him at the dock he was friendly and helpful. He asked Po for the credit card, in less than 5 minutes an assistant and 2 other employees with flatbed bulk carts with his purchases on them. Po had them start loading while he stepped in to sign the credit card slip. He had tried to tip the guys but management wouldn’t allow it, said it was all part of the service. Considering the bill was over $10,000 the management was more than pleased. Outside he stood back while the loading went on, and it went so fast he almost didn’t have time to get out of the way. 20 minutes from pulling up to the dock, he was pulling out of the parking lot and then swinging up onto the interstate.
18 minutes after leaving Cabela’s he had the Sam’s Club manager on the phone. Yes, I am in sight of your store Po told the guy and will be pulling up in front in a minute. Soon as he pulled up, employees started rolling out their carts and an articulated forklift was coming around the side of the building. This management guy was friendly enough but all business and you could tell from the look on his face he wondered what was going on. Sure they sold in bulk, but this order was enough out of the ordinary to get his curiosity going. Several things bothered him, not the least was the fact that this order would virtually bring his stock of several items close to zero. When the guy asked for his credit card and membership card you could see the wheels turning in his head. Sir, could I see some other Id, this is a large purchase and somewhat unusual. I need to perform due diligence, for all parties. No problem I understand completely. Here is my driver’s license, other credit cards in my name as well as my company ID. If that isn’t enough I have my concealed weapons permit. Thank you sir, I will be just a moment. He stepped into store and went behind the service desk. Po figured the guy was calling the credit card company to make sure the card was legit. Sure hope Madd did his due diligence. When the manager came out he wasn’t all that happy. Well sir, everything seems to be in order, the credit card company was informed that there would be some large charges on the card by your home company. With a smile, Po thanked him. He could feel the goose flesh on his arms, he had no idea what kind of company those cards were issued to and if the guy had asked him what kind of company it was, he would have been sunk. Thanks again, he told the manager, I better see to the loading. The man just gave him an apprising eye. Nope he was not a happy camper. He did his job and was polite, but he just didn’t feel good about this deal, you could see it in his eyes.
Out at the truck, the guys loading were trying to figure out how to get a pallet into the bed of the truck. Sorry sir, but, I don’t see how we can load the canned goods with the fork lift, the trailer keeps us from loading from the back and the sides of the truck won’t allow us to lower the load enough to get the forks back out. Looking at it, Po could see there was little hope of doing it the easy way. How many of those pallets and flat carts are for me? All of them sir. All? Wow. No help for it. Ok guys stand back for a minute, I will unhook. Fortunately there was an electric assist on the tongue jack, it took him 5 minutes to unhook the safety chains and flip the switch and lift the tongue up enough to pull forward. Letting the tailgate down, they could now get the forklift up to the back of the truck. The pallets all looked fully packed, filled to the same height over the whole area and tightly shrink wrapped. How many high can we stack these guys? Well in the store we stack them 2 to 3 pallets high depending on how tall the load is. It isn’t the height exactly, it is the weight. The bottom pallets would have to be loaded with something that is ridged, so that it doesn’t crush under the load of the upper pallets. In theory you could go 4 or 5 high if they were not too heavy and not too tall. With what you have here, we can stack the canned goods on first, they are a little less than 3’ high. They measure 48” by 39”. If you want to leave your tailgate down we can stack 2 pallets high and 3 pallets long. If that is an 8’ bed with the tailgate down you will only be sticking over 4”. The tongue on the trailer seems a little longer than usual, so it might make it possible to still turn if you don’t jackknife it. No, I don’t want to do that. You got anything smaller than those pallets. We get some specialty items that come on nonstandard pallets, let me go around back and see. Fine, but start the forklift guy on getting the 4 up next to the cab before you go, I am short on time. Sure thing. Po looked around at all the other stuff that needed to be loaded, it didn’t look promising. As the kid was running off to find pallets he called after him. Bring a manual pallet jack when you come. Kid waved and kept going.
You guys here to help as well? The assistant manager sent us to see if there was anything we could do. Alright, come to the back of this trailer. I know this isn’t what you signed up for, but I need help getting that furniture out of the trailer on to the sidewalk and after the trailer is loaded, back on the trailer. One of the kids looked at him and asked. Why not just load the back of the trailer and leave the furniture where it is? Because those pallets of rice, beans, pasta. As well as the ones loaded down with cans of chicken weigh a lot and we need to get as much weigh over the axles as possible, unfortunately the furniture is light and needs to go in back. I would be happy to slip you guys a couple hundred for your effort. We couldn’t do that, we would get fired. I see. Thanks for the offer though. Come on Greg let’s get it done, all pays the same. (Laughing they got to work) It is kind of crowded in here sir, if you will just stand outside and direct where you want this stuff, we will unload. Great and thanks guys. While they were working Po slipped up to the truck and got out 4 $100 bills, folded them and went back to supervise.
That’s right guys, just grab them from the top and pull them back. Stepping in to point at what he was talking about he slipped 2 bills in each guys pocket and pretended nothing happened. Taking their cue from him they said nothing and just kept working. By the time they were done unloading the forklift operator was sitting looking board, but the kid with the pallet jack was back with 4 smaller pallets. Found some that are 48”x18” but that might be too tight, let me try one. He hoisted the empty pallet into the bed of the truck and pushed it up tight to the ones in front. Lifting the gate he swung it up. It took a hefty slam, but the gate did lock in place. Kid was all smiles and Po thanked him.
I have been a lurker for a while and only recently signed up. I have a friend who has always been there for me. His life and relationships like many, have not been the Beaver Cleaver family variety. Over the years we have discussed books and ideas. To amuse myself and him, I decided to write a story that he could see a small part of himself in and hopefully make him laugh.
I am not a an actual writer. I have no formal training and as I recall I made all my English teachers run screaming from the room.
Be warned that I make no claims to ability nor to being capable of writing anything entertaining. I can't spell and grammar is something you dunk in milk and eat after supper, right? If you proceed beyond this point and actually read what I have written remember you have had fair warning. What you see here is part of a much larger story line but I felt it could be a stand alone story so thought I would post it. I did go to the trouble of copyrighting the whole story. All I ask is that you not post this on any other sites. Also be warned that the story I post here is all there will be. The end is truly the end of this part of the story so there won't be any MOAR posted. :)
Run, while you still can!
A short story
(Sound of dueling banjos from Deliverance)
Doggone phone, thought Po, just have to wait till I get this part clamped down. (Sound of dueling banjos from Deliverance) (Silence) Hold on hold on I’ll get to you in a sec. Funny seems to have stopped. (Sound of dueling banjos from Deliverance) What the heck? Who is being so persistent? Doggone phone is going to drive me insane one day! (Sound of dueling banjos from Deliverance) Stepping away from his machine Po wipes his oily hands on a rag and grabs the phone. Out of state and a number I don’t know, what the heck? Hello? Po listen. Madd? What the heck Madd you gone crazy or what. (Laughing) Po you in the shop? Its daylight and a work day, where the heck do suppose I’d be? Po, listen, I need you to walk away from your machine to a place quiet enough to talk, just trust me, walk away now! That’s strange, Madd never calls or asks for anything, guess I better humor him. OK, I’m in the break room but make it quick. My machine is making a couple of passes on a $3,000 part and it has to ship today. Po, you ever know me to be involved in a practical joke or do a single thing to harm anyone we know? No, can’t say I have, you have always been dependable and there when I needed to vent about how crappy life can be. Po I am going to ask for a lot of trust, but I swear to you, what I am about to say is a fact and not supposition. Oookkk, what’s up? You remember our discussions about me having some sources that could let us know in advance if the **** was going to hit the fan? About knowing people that could give us a warning if the world as we know it was about to collapse? We gonna talk about this on the phone guy, it isn’t very good opsec? Frankly you got me a little worried, what’s up Madd? Truth to tell Po, it’s time to be a lot more than worried about now. To answer your question, in 10 hours give or take, opsec on these phones won’t matter in the least.
Po’s blood ran cold. He, Madd and the cousins had discussed end of the world scenarios and how to prepare many times. Considering what he knew about the person he was talking to, Po was positive he wasn’t going to like what came next.
Here goes, and just listen till I finish. Over in Afghanistan our squad got hooked up with a guy doing black ops. You met him there, we just called him Al. We did 4 or 5 things with him, on the last one he got shot up, you had headed back state side before we did that last run. Our guys were hurting too, but we managed to get ourselves out of a tight spot. We got everyone including him out of there. Was bad real bad. He survived but was flown out to Germany. That was the last time we saw him for a while. The cousins and I sort of adopted him. After getting back and healing up he got kicked upstairs in his agency and that was that. We all kept in touch like guys who have served together sometimes do, with a lot of standup guys like you, ones that have become good friends. He became more. I had this aunt who was a widow and he fell for her in a big way. She thought he walked on water so they became an item. He has become part of the family. This is important so pay attention. He is now family and would never jerk us around.
I have no idea how, but he knows that Iran is about to launch 4 nukes at Israel. The Israelis found out about it. There are no obvious signs that they intend anything. However the usual give and take of information between our countries seems to have gotten a little less productive. Digging below the surface of day to day exchanges seems to indicate that all their agencies like the Mossad are locked down. It’s more like they have all their people too busy to keep up the usual facade, not that they were exactly blabbermouths to begin with. Even though they are maintaining the “business as usual” pretense our source has sources that have fed him vital information. The Israelis didn’t take the information about Iran’s upcoming attack at all well.
Estimates are that Israel has 100 to 400 nukes and Jericho intercontinental ballistic missiles. With a range of 11,500 km (7,000 miles) they can take out the whole Middle East plus, if they want. There is speculation they have better missiles available so who knows how far they can reach. Even the 7,000 miles will let them reach Moscow. That all sounds pretty bad, but it gets worse. No one knows all the missile sites that the Israelis have missiles at, but at least 70 sites suspected of housing missiles are showing some type of minor activity. They are 7 hours ahead of us, I called you at 8:10am that makes it 3:10pm there, only a few hours till daylight. This isn’t conventional warfare, there is no advantage to waiting until just before dawn to start an attack as you would when attacking a troop position. Best guess is they might wait till the next night to launch. It’s easier to conceal what they are doing when it gets dark again, and that would let them finish any last minute adjustments in the dark. Sundown this time of year is about 7:30pm full dark around 8:30 their time. With luck that gives you 5 1/2 hours plus, maybe as much as 6 or 7, if you walk out right now.
Po, go, you need to leave NOW. I know this is hard to believe but it is a fact. Some kind of serious crap is about to go down. Russia hasn’t been at all pleased with Israel and the US thwarting their plans for the Middle East. What happens if they use this as an excuse to rid the world of a thorn in their side? Is the US going to sit around while that happens? I grant you that considering who we have leading our country it’s a possible scenario, but the military might force his hand one way or the other. If Israel should decide no help is coming and they are about to be wiped out, who knows where all those nukes might be sent? What happens to the world if they decide to nuke all the oilfields in the Middle East? The world will implode without Middle East oil. There is just way too much chance of this thing going south. If that happens I think we can safely say the whole world is going to have a very bad day!
Bud, I can’t just walk out, I just can’t. I have to try and save some of the people I work with. Some are family too, maybe not as close as I would like, but family just the same. I understand Po, but think about it for a sec, how many will believe you when you tell them, a friend of a friend told you so?
I believe you Madd, it is hard but knowing you, you are doing your best to give me information you believe to be a fact. What if your guys is wrong, or it doesn’t get as bad as you fear?
What if it does and you haven’t tried to get to your parents, and your other relatives down home? You might make it without them. But they will need you if things only get half as bad as they might. They are going to need you there, not hundreds of miles away. If things get bad enough fast enough you will never make it home through the mobs trying to get out of your city. What about those big population centers between you and home? If you have to, you might walk home in 5 or 6 weeks, if you don’t get killed on the way. But what might happen to your family down there in 6 weeks? Or if you don’t make it at all? I have to try Madd. With a heavy sigh Madd said, I know Po, just don’t take too long. Do me one favor besides getting out of there ASAP. Call me as soon as you walk out of work at this number, don’t forget, it is important, OK? Sure thing Bud, I will get back to you, my word on it.
Hello, that you Po? Ya, bud it’s me. You don’t sound all that happy, guess it didn’t go all that well? No bud it didn’t. Bottom line is, they would have called the guys in the white coats if I tried to take it any further. I know it is hard for anyone to believe the world as they know it I going to end, but it doesn’t change the fact. That’s true Madd, I might have had a chance if they didn’t bring up religion. Religion? Ya, they kept saying God would never allow such a thing to happen. Ah….ah..sorry Po I just don’t know what to say to something as stupid as that. Neither did I Madd, one of the reasons I couldn’t convince them was that I didn’t have an answer either.
(Sound of a Ford F250 starting up) I am headed to the apartment now Madd, what was it you wanted me to call about? You got your receiver hitch and that e-tool you told me you always carry to dig you out of the snow and stuff, with you? Sure, the receiver is locked in so the hitch can’t be stolen and the e-tool is like an American Express card, never leave home without it. What’s up? Ok, about 6 blocks from your apartment there is an All Seasons climate controlled storage facility, you know it? I pass it about 3-4 times a week so I know where it is. Pull into the lot in front, go to the far end of the parking spaces and you will see some large rocks that are the boarder for the parking lot edge. How long before you get there? Maybe 6 minutes. K, I will stay on the line, you concentrate on driving.
Bud, I’m there what now? Pull up so that your truck blocks the view of those rocks from the rest of the facility. With that brick wall to your right you should be able to block 95% of the view from anyone. Got it blocked, what now? Count 9 rocks from the right, it has a spot on top that is more flat than the others, see it? Hmm, I see it. All right, it’s heavy but you should be able to roll it backward 18” or so with some effort. Roll a rock? Just please do it. OK, got it rolled back what now? Take your e-tool, dig down about 16”, and you will find what looks like a flattish rock about the size of your fist, pick it up. It might feel a little funny. When you have it, use the e-tool to hit it, it should break apart. It is a type of Plaster of Paris and while it was made and colored to look like any rock found in that dirt, it should be a lot softer. After you break it you will find a plastic bag with keys and some papers. (Clanging and damning) OK, got it Madd. Great Po, there is a string of numbers on one of the papers. It will allow you to use the security keypad for the drive in door to your far left. You can just drive in, the storage cubicles are all well numbered. The one you are looking for is about 10 cubicles in. When you find it, just back up to it as close as you can, and open the cubicle. There is a lock combo below the numbers you used to get into the facility. Let me know when you get it opened and Po, hurry as much as you can without breaking anything, the clock is ticking as we speak.
(Pounding, screeching and damning) Got it opened, there is a heavy duty closed trailer here. Triple axles, thing looks like you could fill it with lead and it wouldn’t even notice it. Good deal Po, now just hook up to it and head home, the trailer pigtail will hook up to the standard Ford plug by your back bumper, and the trailer is titled and tagged in your state as a rental trailer. That is if a Ford 250 will actually haul anything. Hey, hey what are you saying? A Ford with the trailer towing package like I got will tow 12,000 14,000 pounds buddy! (Choking laughter) If you say so Po, I would feel better if you had a Chevy. Ya right! It only has to haul it approximately 300 miles one time, it might make it. You are serious aren’t you, what is in there anyway? Tell you in a second. Another one of the keys will open the back of the trailer the second will open a metal security box in the trailer, but don’t worry about that right now. There is a manila envelope with a lease agreement in there. It will provide all the paperwork you need to show you legitimately leased this trailer and have the right to take it anywhere you want. Just in case you should get pulled over, but do not get pulled over! See the little pushed out place at the front of the trailer, looks like a sort of flat V shape that comes out onto the trailer hitch? Yep, looks like it houses a generator on one side of some type and a largish fuel tank in a separate compartment to the side of it. You will need to start that up, it is a small cooler similar to the type long haul truckers use to cool their tractors so they don’t have to run the engine all night to stay cool. Unless you get into some really hot direct sunlight it will keep the trailer and its contents at around 65 degrees. You will also find 3 high grade satellite phones that are paid up, they may need to be charged but they have an adapter for the lighter socket. There are some phone numbers in that envelope that we can use to communicate with. Soon as you get one of those charged up, don’t use your personal phone to call me again. The number I am using now and my old number will cease to exist in another hour.
Madd, what is going on bud, I mean what is all this? My friend as much as I hate to say it, I believe it’s the end of the world as we know it. Since the guy I told you about has been with my aunt, he has seen the world sliding closer to the brink almost every day. Believe me, he and a close circle of friends are in a position to see a lot of things that the rest of the world and a lot of other government agencies have no idea about. You are still working as we talk right? I am I am. Good.
About the trailer. I was worried things would go pop from what I was hearing. But nothing was certain, and until this thing with Iran, it looked like the world might keep chugging along, no way to know. I wanted to help protect you and yours but knew it would be hard to explain I had a gut feeling and access to intel that things were going south. You and your folks are already prepping, I know that, but this is just some extra for you and your folks. For two reasons I decided to go ahead and preposition that trailer so you couldn’t argue with me. What do you mean argue? If I had said, Hey Po, I am going to give you a trailer, with a lot of survival supplies in it, what would have said? Hmm, I would have said No Way Jose. (Laughing) Exactly. I am over 1,500 miles away. I wasn’t going to be able to be there to help, plus I have family as well, so that trailer was the best I could do. If the world got better I could just come up and get it, no one the wiser, if the world fell apart I could do something for a good friend. Simple as that. Thanks bud, I don’t know what to say. I feel bad about taking something for nothing. Kills you to accept anything, even from a friend, I know that, but in this case there isn’t much you can do now is there? (Laughing) Ass, ok, I am all hooked up and ready to go, but what is behind the plywood divider, looks like over 60% of the trailer is full? (Sounds of a Ford 250 starting and easing into trailer hauling mode) Emergency food supply in ready-made meals that are nitrogen-purged and sealed in 4-serving Mylar pouches, placed inside a tamper-proof sealed square bucket. The 24 stack able buckets are reseal able to keep your supply fresh. The packaging is tough and compact, it uses only a fraction of the space in the trailer for each bucket. The food supply has a 25 year shelf life with proper storage.
3 Servings per day per Person - 2880 servings in (24) Stack able Buckets enough to feed four adults or two adults and four kids for 12 months. The dimensions on each bucket are 10” x 10” x 13”. Trailer box inside is 84”wide, 86” high, 360” or 30’ long. It has 576 buckets, could be more, I am kind of busy here, so I can’t remember exactly how many there are. Actually 250 of them contain, rice, flour, honey, sugar, coffee, well a lot of stuff, can’t remember it all right now. I am talking to you and coordinating some stuff here as well so my brain is kind of split. But they contain about the same amount of nutrition as the prepackaged meal ones do. Figured it would be good for farm folk as they could make their own dishes to suit themselves.
What? What, are you insane? How did you get that many in there? It must have cost $20,000 to buy! How am I going to get the cash to you? I don’t need the cash. You pointed out that cash won’t be worth anything to me plenty of times when we talked about SHTF episodes. No need to worry about sending me something that won’t even make a good fire. As far as being crazy, I think we came to the conclusion long ago that neither of us has all our oars in the water. As for the space, divide it up for yourself. Trailer is 84” wide so 8 buckets fit across. 84” high lets you stack those 6 high. 120” or 10’ lets you stack 12 back. So, 6x8 is 48. 48x12 is 576, see simple. Simple, man calls it simple. (Indistinct mumbling) That is, what 24 years? Give or take that was what I came up with. Sounds like a lot I know, but you have a lot more than 4 adults down home. If there are 8 or 10 of you then you are going to be down, to 10 years or less fairly fast. I have pulled up load out list now. Actually there are 576 + buckets of food and 30, 5 gallon buckets full of heirloom seeds and other stuff you might find useful. I am speechless, don’t know what to say. Wow, you speechless? Bet your ex-wives would never believe that. (Laughing) Damn bud, you would have to bring them up. The world ending isn’t bad enough, you just had to make me think of them! (Laughing and choking) Sorry Po, sorry. (Mutual laughing)
I am pulling into the parking garage, good thing that trailer isn’t any higher or I wouldn’t get in here. I have to get loaded, I will call you as I roll out. Po, take what you need, because I doubt you will ever be back, but cut it down to essentials. Computer, clothes, weapons, maybe your sheets and blankets. Stuff can be replace or found, but if you are caught out on the road, having your Barco lounger isn’t going to do you much good. You have to hurry, you need to beat as much of the traffic as you can. Left you space in the back of the trailer but pack your stuff in as tight and neat as you can. There are all kinds of tie downs and some moving blankets back there. If at all possible try and keep the bed of your truck empty. 10-4 Madd. Hmm, maybe I should have been a little more forthcoming with Madd about how much stuff my dad and I already have in stock. He could have saved himself all this trouble. Well, knowing Madd, it probably wouldn’t have mattered. And you can never have too much.
(blurppp blurppp blurppp sound of incoming satellite phone call) Po, you on the road dude? Yeppers rolling now. You did that faster than I thought you would. Caught a break Madd, we have a service here for taking care of the grounds. Lot of Latino guys. I offered 3 of them $40 bucks for 1 hour of work. It only took 28 minutes to load with their help, would have taken me couple of hours by myself. Freaking killed me to pay it but I figured if things get as bad as they might, $120 was cheap to get me on my way. The real motivator was your comment about traffic, I hate traffic with a passion! Good thinking guy.
That metal box where is it? Got in my way so I threw it on the floor of the cab, why? Whooee, OK. There is one more key in all that stuff I gave you, it opens the box. Just a sec Madd, rolling into the gas station to top off, OK, so? You might consider keeping it out of sight while you open it and look inside. I got a bad feeling here Madd, what did you do? Not much, just some corporate credit cards with your name on them. Credit cards, why does one of them look like a Colt 45 Gold Cup Series 70 in mint condition and 6 magazines? And 3 of them look like boxes of 45 ACP ammo? Well, if things get bad you can shove it into some guys face and tell him you want him to leave your credit cards alone. It’s better than a magnetic strip to foil credit card theft. Ya, right, ass. Now that we cleared that up, I remember some guy telling me that credit will be one of the first things to fail. I agree with you, so use them to buy fuel or anything you might need. Don’t pay any more cash for anything if people will take a card. Even if there is a power failure some places are still going to be able to imprint those cards by hand, so use them if you can. Use an ATM to draw out all the cash you can, hold onto that as well. Save cash for now, it won’t be good for long, but it might take a while for people to figure that out.
Way ahead of you Madd. My bank is just a couple blocks down, from this station. I am going to withdraw my savings and safety deposit box. I expect they will make it hard to get much cash though. In my experience banks have no problem taking your money, but if you want very much of it back they will hem and haw. They will say they don’t have a lot on hand or that it is bank policy that you give them 24 or 36 hours’ notice to draw a lot of cash out. They will probably try to get me to take a cashier’s check. But that isn’t much good, because who is going to give me $30,000 or $40,000 cash if my own bank won’t cough it up? Exactly what I was thinking when you said you were going to the bank. Damn Madd you don’t have to agree so quickly. You are just full of good news and cheer today aren’t you? (Laughing) I know it is your money and you want it, but please, don’t spend too much time on it. It won’t help to be dead on the side of the road with full pockets.
How full is the trailer and your truck? I only had a one bedroom apartment, so didn’t have much furniture actually. Got my computers, weapons, ammo, cloths and most all the breakable stuff in the extra cab. Had to put some of the preps I had up here in the extra cab and some in the trailer. Bed of the truck is totally empty, and I used less than 10’ of the trailer for some furniture and boxes I packed odds and ends into. Mostly light stuff. Could have moved it all myself, but I would have had to make 20 trips up and down the elevators if I didn’t have help. Worked well, one set of guys loading, one set going down the elevator with a load, and then loading as the other set went back up and grabbed more stuff to take down. They were a lot of help with my collapsible pontoon boat too. Made moving it much easier. Didn’t know what to do with it exactly, so I pulled out of the garage and had those guys help me strap it to the top of the trailer. Good thing I am moving though. Why is that Po? I kept turning the elevator off, so I would have it to use without waiting for it. As I was walking to my truck the apartment management guy found me and started giving me crap. I told him to kiss my hairy ass. (Laughing and choking) Then I just kept walking away from the little ****. Left that damn couch behind. The one that seemed to trap you into sleeping on it and waking up all crippled? That would be the one. (Lots of laughing from both ends of the connection) Get back to you in a few, at the bank.
(blurppp blurppp blurppp sound of satellite phone call) Yo. Hey Madd, back in the truck and rolling, we were right they gave me a lot of tap dancing and excuses. Managed to get about half, after I threatened to take a dump in the middle of the bank floor. Wow, I am surprised you got out of there without being arrested. It was close, very close. Sorry it didn’t go better Po. You going down I75 to Columbus then around Columbus on I270? Sure am, same way I always go, why? According to what you said you have something like 8’ of trailer floor empty? That’s about right, why? On the east branch of I270 there is a Sam’s Club, I will text you the address and phone number. I believe you can see it from the highway. OK, so? I placed an order there, it will be all palletized and shrink wrapped. It is paid for, all you have to do is show them the credit card and let them scan it, and you are good to go. They assured me they can get into the bed of your truck with a forklift they use for stocking shelves that are hard to access. The forks articulate and will fit down into the bed of your truck. Call them when you are about 15 minutes out and they will have someone ready to load you. They said their guys will also help you strap it and tarp it. I want to argue about taking all this from you, because I don’t feel good about it. I know you don’t like it. So don’t take it for you, take it for your little nephew, the other kids and your folks. I can’t force you to take it PO, but as a friend I hope you will. Crap, you would have to bring the kids into the argument. I’ll take it, but I am going to pay you for all of it one day. If things don’t go bad you can laugh and point at me, and I won’t mind one bit Po. If things get bad I am going to be worried about you guys over there, and I will have enough on my mind without having to wonder if you are OK. Friends help friends and real friends are hard to come by, ya know? I do, I surely do Madd. What about these credit cards Madd, I mean how do we pay for stuff we get on them? Knowing you they must be legit so at some point they will need to be paid, right? Guess that depends on how things go. If what I think will happen, happens, no one is ever going to ask for payment. If it doesn’t happen, we can split up the food etc. and live a long time without ever having to go to the grocery store. The way you say that sounds logical, but I just can’t help feeling there is a flaw in there somewhere. Only one? I must be doing better than I thought Po. Money isn’t our biggest worry any more. Surviving has to be at the top of our list now. Did you call your parents about this? Yes, while I was moving my stuff out to the trailer. My dad is on board, he has always thought it possible things would go crazy so he has been prepping for a while. But mom is upset. Dad is out laying in supplies as we speak. I told them to keep all this on the down low. Not sure my mom can resist warning the family though. I need to go Po, lots to do around here. The girls need me to help organize. If you need anything, anything at all just let me know. If you think of anything you need from Sam’s etc, call the number that is written in red, that will put you onto one of the girls, she can call in anything to Sam’s or anywhere else, for pick up as you swing by. Catch you in a bit Po. Thanks Madd, talk at you later.
Yes dad I am being careful, but this phone is driving me nuts. I been on the road for 2 hours and it never seems to stop ringing. I have been on with someone, from mom to everyone she told what was happening. Seems like she didn’t really understand my asking her to keep it on the down low. Ask her to please stop giving my number to every family member that calls. Sorry son, she has a big heart and want’s to protect the family. I know, and I feel bad having to worry her. I have to go, I need to think. OK son, you be careful and get here soon, but don’t speed or get hurt, ok? Ok dad. Have to turn this cell phone off. Hope things are going good for Madd and his people, at least he hasn’t been chewing my ear off over the satellite phone. Satellite phone…hmmm..crap. Grabbing the phone Po calls the red number.
(blurppp blurppp blurppp sound of satellite phone call) Hello, Richardson residence. Hi I am Po, I don’t know if you are the right person but Madd said to call if I needed anything. Yes sir I am the girl on duty how may I assist you sir? (Silence) Hello sir, something wrong? No, you just took me off guard is all. Sorry sir. Never mind what’s your name? Cindy speaking. Cindy do you know what is going on, what road I am on and the area I am headed for? I do sir and I know that time is of the essence. Tell me what you need and I will either make it happen or get enough of the girls to help me make it happen sir. How may we be of service sir? Cindy I have been thinking for the last hour of things I need from Cabela’s, do you know what that is? I do, and you don’t need to be polite or delicate or hold my hand, just tell me what you need sir and it will happen. I have been fully briefed on the situation both worldwide as well as your situation sir. I see, I have a rather long list of things I would like to have ready for pick up at Cabela’s. I am getting closer so I don’t have a lot of time. Certainly sir, go ahead I can take down 120 words a minute so talk as fast as you like. (10 minutes later) Got all that Cindy? Yes sir, one of the other girls is on with the store management, giving them your order as you gave it to me. It will be pulled and ready as soon as they can manage it sir. Thanks Cindy that’s great. My pleasure sir. One thing sir. You might consider a tip if things are ready by the time you get there. $1,000 for the manager $500 for his assistant, $150 for each man loading. I believe that might make things proceed smoothly sir. If you examine the bottom of your metal strong box you will see that underneath the weapon and ammunition there is a flat pull up divider. Under that is a sum of money. In addition you will see 4 plastic cylinders. 2 contain 1oz gold coins. The larger 2 contain ¼ and ½oz gold bars. Additionally there are 2 drawstring bags containing pre-1964 silver coins. Is there anything else myself or the household can do to assist you sir? No, no I don’t think so, and thank you Cindy. My pleasure sir. For your convenience, should you need to contact us again, it is not necessary to use our first names. Whoever picks up the phone will answer to “girl”, there is no time for political correctness. All you need do sir, is to start talking after they have answered and you are certain you have reached the correct location. It might speed things up and will make them more comfortable in serving your needs sir. Names are usually reserved for social gatherings. Fine, thank you Cindy. Thank you sir.
Checking his time as he swings off the interstate, Po calculated it had been 3 hours 20 minutes since Madd first called him and it is still 3 hours plus to the farm. I am running out of time. The Cabela’s manager answered on the second ring, and agreed to meet him at the loading dock, all he needed was the physical credit card to run and his men would start loading. When the manager met him at the dock he was friendly and helpful. He asked Po for the credit card, in less than 5 minutes an assistant and 2 other employees with flatbed bulk carts with his purchases on them. Po had them start loading while he stepped in to sign the credit card slip. He had tried to tip the guys but management wouldn’t allow it, said it was all part of the service. Considering the bill was over $10,000 the management was more than pleased. Outside he stood back while the loading went on, and it went so fast he almost didn’t have time to get out of the way. 20 minutes from pulling up to the dock, he was pulling out of the parking lot and then swinging up onto the interstate.
18 minutes after leaving Cabela’s he had the Sam’s Club manager on the phone. Yes, I am in sight of your store Po told the guy and will be pulling up in front in a minute. Soon as he pulled up, employees started rolling out their carts and an articulated forklift was coming around the side of the building. This management guy was friendly enough but all business and you could tell from the look on his face he wondered what was going on. Sure they sold in bulk, but this order was enough out of the ordinary to get his curiosity going. Several things bothered him, not the least was the fact that this order would virtually bring his stock of several items close to zero. When the guy asked for his credit card and membership card you could see the wheels turning in his head. Sir, could I see some other Id, this is a large purchase and somewhat unusual. I need to perform due diligence, for all parties. No problem I understand completely. Here is my driver’s license, other credit cards in my name as well as my company ID. If that isn’t enough I have my concealed weapons permit. Thank you sir, I will be just a moment. He stepped into store and went behind the service desk. Po figured the guy was calling the credit card company to make sure the card was legit. Sure hope Madd did his due diligence. When the manager came out he wasn’t all that happy. Well sir, everything seems to be in order, the credit card company was informed that there would be some large charges on the card by your home company. With a smile, Po thanked him. He could feel the goose flesh on his arms, he had no idea what kind of company those cards were issued to and if the guy had asked him what kind of company it was, he would have been sunk. Thanks again, he told the manager, I better see to the loading. The man just gave him an apprising eye. Nope he was not a happy camper. He did his job and was polite, but he just didn’t feel good about this deal, you could see it in his eyes.
Out at the truck, the guys loading were trying to figure out how to get a pallet into the bed of the truck. Sorry sir, but, I don’t see how we can load the canned goods with the fork lift, the trailer keeps us from loading from the back and the sides of the truck won’t allow us to lower the load enough to get the forks back out. Looking at it, Po could see there was little hope of doing it the easy way. How many of those pallets and flat carts are for me? All of them sir. All? Wow. No help for it. Ok guys stand back for a minute, I will unhook. Fortunately there was an electric assist on the tongue jack, it took him 5 minutes to unhook the safety chains and flip the switch and lift the tongue up enough to pull forward. Letting the tailgate down, they could now get the forklift up to the back of the truck. The pallets all looked fully packed, filled to the same height over the whole area and tightly shrink wrapped. How many high can we stack these guys? Well in the store we stack them 2 to 3 pallets high depending on how tall the load is. It isn’t the height exactly, it is the weight. The bottom pallets would have to be loaded with something that is ridged, so that it doesn’t crush under the load of the upper pallets. In theory you could go 4 or 5 high if they were not too heavy and not too tall. With what you have here, we can stack the canned goods on first, they are a little less than 3’ high. They measure 48” by 39”. If you want to leave your tailgate down we can stack 2 pallets high and 3 pallets long. If that is an 8’ bed with the tailgate down you will only be sticking over 4”. The tongue on the trailer seems a little longer than usual, so it might make it possible to still turn if you don’t jackknife it. No, I don’t want to do that. You got anything smaller than those pallets. We get some specialty items that come on nonstandard pallets, let me go around back and see. Fine, but start the forklift guy on getting the 4 up next to the cab before you go, I am short on time. Sure thing. Po looked around at all the other stuff that needed to be loaded, it didn’t look promising. As the kid was running off to find pallets he called after him. Bring a manual pallet jack when you come. Kid waved and kept going.
You guys here to help as well? The assistant manager sent us to see if there was anything we could do. Alright, come to the back of this trailer. I know this isn’t what you signed up for, but I need help getting that furniture out of the trailer on to the sidewalk and after the trailer is loaded, back on the trailer. One of the kids looked at him and asked. Why not just load the back of the trailer and leave the furniture where it is? Because those pallets of rice, beans, pasta. As well as the ones loaded down with cans of chicken weigh a lot and we need to get as much weigh over the axles as possible, unfortunately the furniture is light and needs to go in back. I would be happy to slip you guys a couple hundred for your effort. We couldn’t do that, we would get fired. I see. Thanks for the offer though. Come on Greg let’s get it done, all pays the same. (Laughing they got to work) It is kind of crowded in here sir, if you will just stand outside and direct where you want this stuff, we will unload. Great and thanks guys. While they were working Po slipped up to the truck and got out 4 $100 bills, folded them and went back to supervise.
That’s right guys, just grab them from the top and pull them back. Stepping in to point at what he was talking about he slipped 2 bills in each guys pocket and pretended nothing happened. Taking their cue from him they said nothing and just kept working. By the time they were done unloading the forklift operator was sitting looking board, but the kid with the pallet jack was back with 4 smaller pallets. Found some that are 48”x18” but that might be too tight, let me try one. He hoisted the empty pallet into the bed of the truck and pushed it up tight to the ones in front. Lifting the gate he swung it up. It took a hefty slam, but the gate did lock in place. Kid was all smiles and Po thanked him.
Run, while you still can!
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