Tell me how to help my wife.

My FIL (83) has stage 4 COPD.he is a nasty grouch who is in denial and is driving my loving wife up the wall.she loves him and tries her best to help him but he is quite the A-hole,always.she has been having some pretty bad anxiety issues and mood swings.he wants to stay at home,wont shower or dress,will hardly feed himself but still drives by hauling an o2 bottle around.he does practically nothing except rant,watch tv and thats pretty much it.My wife brings him food and every effing day he needs his sausage Mcmuffin and an iced coffee.I try my best here at home by walking our dog,cooking,shopping,etc.but I had a heart attack last month after a history of heart problems and a kidney transplant 5 years ago and cannot work anymore.(I'm 60 now)and we are facing one hell of a lot of financial issues.and,I have not been feeling right.

Sometimes,I just want to do him in but,I wont because I do not want to leave her alone.we have no children and are pretty much alone and Fil is driving her and me nuts.

I just do not know what to do to help her besides support her anyway I can.

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Tell me how to help my wife.