A shooter's inconsistency?

I have a legitimate question here. I REALLY don't want a 9 vs 45 argument, I was hoping some of you deeper thinkers could comment on what I perceive as an illogical belief.

I think we can all agree that there are a lot of people (probably the majority) that prefer a high capacity 9mm over a lower capacity .45 simply due to the number of rounds held. Disregard platform arguments.

I think we can all agree that there are a lot of people (probably the majority) that prefer a 12 gauge over an AR-15 for home defense because of it's incredible power.

So why do we accept the argument that the power of a 12 gauge is so awesome that you only need 8 rounds but we generally don't accept that the power of a .45 (or really a better argument would be a .44 mag revolver) is so awesome that you only need 6 rounds?

We seem to default to the 9mm in handguns and use the opposite argument when defaulting to the shotgun for home defense. That's the puzzler to me. Now I know people are concerned about over penetration with the 5.56 and that is surely a legitimate argument -but it's the only one I can think of.

Anyone have some insight?

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A shooter's inconsistency?