jeudi 8 octobre 2020

Everything we humans like in life is bad for you!

So---I'm now attending cardiac rehab after getting a valve replacement.

The exercises are ok. But, boy! Are the lectures and movies depressing!

All that stuff about "healthy eating" and "healthy lifestyles".

Forget eating that deep dish pan pizza.....welcome to the joys of steamed broccoli!

Got a hankering for a steak with french fries? Don't you even DARE! Just be satisfied with that piece of steamed fish....and NO tartar sauce. And just forget about any salt.

Reaching for that package of Oreos? Heaven forbid! Bust your molars on some whole walnuts or almonds.

Given the chance, we'd all be smoking cigarettes like crazy. Calms the nerves, and a great stress reliever? Well....be prepared to get VERY excited and upset. Because of that dreaded (GASP! HORROR!) nicotine will kill you!

And how many of us would prefer after a nice meal, to sit in the easy chair and watch TV? BLASPHEMY! HERESY! NO WAY!!! You must make your mandatory offerings to the Great Gods of Fitness. By going outside and running around in circles....rain or shine!

Oh...and one other thing....forget about sex! It gives you AIDS!

It seems that everything we enjoy in life, is out to do us in.

It seems that the only way for us to avoid a premature croaking, is to live the life of a vegetarian monk with the body figure of someone with anorexia.

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Everything we humans like in life is bad for you!

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